rb endless blue

We depend on nature not only for our physical survival. We also need nature to show us the way home, the way out of the prison of our own minds. We got lost in doing, thinking, remembering, anticipating – lost in a maze of complexity and a world of problems.

We have forgotten what rocks, plants, and animals still know. We have forgotten how to be – to be still, to be ourselves, to be where life is: Here and Now.

Whenever you bring your attention to anything natural, anything that has come into existence without human intervention, you step out of the prison of conceptualized thinking and, to some extent, participate in the state of connectedness with Being in which everything natural still exists.

To bring your attention to a stone, a tree, or an animal does not mean to think about it, but simply to perceive it, to hold it in your awareness.

Something of its essence then transmits itself to you. You can sense how still it is, and in doing so the same stillness arises within you.

-Eckhart Tolle

I have not felt much peace in my life lately-there hasn’t been much of a resting place -but I realized yesterday that really, I’ve never felt totally at peace since I was a child, playing on the beaches of lake Michigan……File_01 beach copy

I try not to worry about things, try to stay in the now, try not to think… as I know that’s the key to inner peace and the primary teaching of all the spiritual least all those who I’ve listened to and followed…

But my mind, ” the voice in the head” is always talking and it’s not a very positive voice either.. I’m always in a hurry.. always worrying..mostly now about money, whether I’ll make it through another month.. and then feeling I should complete several things before, as I heard someone say once, “before I check out.” So many people in my age group are have died recently: David Bowie, Glen Frey of the Eagles, Native American activist, John Trudell, my generation…

But late yesterday afternoon, I was sitting in front of the windows in my living roomlace and snow and I was watching my wolfdog, Shiloh playing in the snowshiloh close…it had snowed the night before…snowed:moon jan 26 and the snow was blowing and he was trying to catch it and he was also trying to catch the ravens…RAVEN:PINE:BLUEthey tease him, flying very slow and hopping around, eating his food..but he never catches them…shiloh gold eyes

So I was watching all of this and suddenly I realized that I was feeling that same sense of peace and magic that I had once felt as a child…the sun coming through the windows was really warm [I live off the grid and even though it was very cold and wintry outside, the sun warmed the living room] and I felt I could sit there forever watching the blowing snow, the wolf and the ravens..

And I remembered..

As a young child, I spent the summers with my grandparents in their summer cottage on the shores of lake Michigan….lm waterMy childhood was a painful one..filled with loss, death, and sadness..but the summers in Michigan gave me what I needed to keep going.

There was no sense of time then…I think because I was so totally connected with nature..

One summer when I was about 10, my cousin and I rescued hundreds of monarch butterflies that had washed up on the beach and every summer, we spent hundreds of hours searching for and collecting stones that we called ‘pretty stones’.pretty stones

my beach We often hiked with our uncle who showed us magical and beautiful places on different inland lakesMYSTICAL HAMLIN and in the dunes…rb dunes

Listening, on foggy days, to the foghorn in the lighthouse which was not far from our cottage..rb lighthouse copy was beautiful and mysterious and we never minded that those days we usually stayed inside by the fire..

So everything was magical and beautiful until one summer, some of that peace ended because I became a teenager, martha and meturning more toward..all that teenagers turn to..

My grandfather loved to sit in his rocking chair on the large screened in porch that faced the lake. badger sunsetHe could watch the big car ferries coming in from their long trip across the lake and he knew by their whistles which ferry it was :the Badger, the Spartan, the Midland,the Flint….bye badger:lighthouse

He wanted me to, as I always had, to sit with him but that summer I was restless..I had a boyfriend and I wanted to be with him…I hadn’t lost my love for the lake or for nature but I had lost the peace of childhood...

Yesterday, that peace kind of came back watching the wolf and the ravens and so I think it’s like Eckhart Tolle says in the quote above We have forgotten what rocks, plants, and animals still know. We have forgotten how to be – to be still, to be ourselves, to be where life is: Here and Now….”

This clip below is of the S.S. Badger, the car-ferry which still crosses Lake Michigan, going from Ludington, Mi to Manitowoc, has been a symbol in a way for our family of crossing from one life to another…and the sound of it’s whistle will always take me back to my earliest memories of summers..beach family there on that lake…



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