Los Lobos del Norte at Christmas

shi_eyesReally, I just wanted to write down some thoughts about Christmas and I wanted to thank all those people who helped me this past year and I also wanted to put up some amazing photos my friend Karen Yeager took of my wolfdogs, Los Lobos del Norte last week…..Maybe I can weave this all together….or maybe not.

This is always a little bit of a sad time time of year for me because no matter how many years pass, I still miss Christmas with my family that I was born into. I was telling a friend a few nights ago about what those Christmases were like back then when I was little and living in Hinsdale, Il [a suburb of Chicago]. The traditions: Eating breakfast under the tree at Marshall Fields, A trip downtown marshall-fields-on-state-street-chicago-2to look at the Christmas windows,Sierra Exif JPEG Picking out a tree with my cousins and our uncle always with the snow falling, The old treasured ornaments we put up year after, Sledding and Skating on Christmas Day.SNOWSUIT ME

But those Christmases are in the distant past, they will never be again and here I am living in the mountains of northern New Mexico, living a life I never, ever could possibly have imagined. As I’m writing it’s starting to snow.

So I still have the snow.

I guess most people look back this time of year and as I look back,  I’m looking at a year that has been incredibly difficult. Over and over I’ve tried to understand what I was supposed to learn from my difficulties: I’m not doing the right visualizations, I have too many negative thoughts [I do], I’m a victim and I’ll never succeed etc, etc. etc. I talked to astrologers, card readers, curenderos, healers to no avail-nothing worked… and then last night I came upon this:

Abundance is the ability to do what you need to do when you need to do it….and trusting that what is happening is happening for a reason otherwise it wouldn’t be happening.

Simple and obvious [maybe that was what everyone was trying to tell me and I couldn’t hear it] and I saw that though it may not have been easy, I have been able to do what I needed to do when I needed to do it and that so many things that happened this past year, happened for a reason that I didn’t understand at the time.

Here’s one example:

In June my older wolfdog, Dakota died,shiloh loves dakota leaving 15 month old Shiloh behind. Wolfdogs, being pack animals are not meant to live alone shiloh:blue jay first snowand so I set out to find Shiloh a companion.

It would be easy-I knew I could do this-there are so many rescue centers, shelters, so many animals needing a home but  but no matter what I tried, I could not find a companion for Shiloh. This went on for several weeks and I got more and more discouraged looking at Shiloh so alone in his pen.

Then I came upon the website of Wanagi Wolf Rescue outside of Albuquerque and everything fell into place. I began to work with an amazing group of wolf/wolfdog rescuers and Shiloh had not only one companion but 2 within a few months.


Sakina,Shiloh and Apollo with their dog friend, Roadie   photo credit: Karen Yeager


Apollo, Shiloh with their dog friend, Roadie     photo credit: Karen Yeager

And because we rescued these 2 wolfdogs [from the jaws of death], our friend from Wanagi Wolf Rescue donates freezer- fulls diy-freezer-wholeof elk, venison and ground meat for all the wolfdogs and this would never have happened if I had been initially successful in finding Shiloh a companion.

As there was so little money, we-Jody and I-  learned to barter more- trading wood for hay for the horses….puck-leg-upredmanand friends who came to visit brought food.

Jody[the Brown Piglet] created and sold a lot of his art-altarsmother-of-roses-altar2 altars night

and crosses..


Because I have always been able to pay for things-I grew up that way-, I didn’t really understand barter but it’s actually much more satisfying than paying with money–it’s much more of an equal exchange and it may be the way of the future.

If there had not been such a need for money, Jody might not have worked on his art so much but doing something he loved was incredibly healing for him and though it isn’t barter, still it is an exchange of love, caring and goodwill for money.

Sometimes I see pictures of the homes of friends I grew up with and went to school with and I feel a little envious- not for the homes but for an affluent lifestyle where money is never a concern. But I know that I turned that option down long ago and that I could never live that way again. I think, like ET, I would probably begin to die without the pine forest surrounding me, the cold mountain air, the warm fires in the wood stoves and the animals. No I could never go back.

A few days ago my family in Texas sent me a box of treasures and among the treasures were a roll of salami and a box of fudge. At the same time a friend had sent me the classic movie, ‘The Bishops Wife’ with Cary Grant and David Niven. I had been sick for several days and not able to eat but I sat in my fur covered rocking chair in front of the fire and while I watched ‘The Bishop’s Wife’, I ate the salami [all of it] and then the fudge. And that’s abundance!

I want to thank all of the people who helped me this year sometimes with contributions of money, sometimes food or gifts, sometimes encouraging words, sometimes just listening. The spiritual teacher, Eckhart Tolle has said that 2 of the best things we can do for another is to really listen and to leave them alone. I understand this to mean listening with full, undivided attention and to resist giving advice. When you’re down, I have discovered, there are people who will LOVE to give you advice. Giving advice= a way of feeling superior.

Anyway I don’t want to mention names because I don’t want to leave anyone out but I do want to mention one friend who checked in with me every few days, who always, with a sense of humor and goodwill, listened and encouraged me, who never gave advice and who often sent DVDS and books and gifts to cheer me up. Thank you Nancy, so much for helping me through the tough times.

*I still need help and I will for a while as I work to recover from some very unfortunate circumstances. If you want to help in some way, either with a contribution or by buying one of our art pieces, t-shirts, hoodies, films etc, you can go to Gofundme  which has the story of the ‘unfortunate circumstances’, to POOH’S STOREto Our Films’  or use the donate-pay it forward button on the side of this blog.

hobbiton gates oct 13Merry Christmas and Hope always..for the New Year from here.. in the Land of Enchantment


I’m posting a couple film clips I love..below

The Turtle Lodge on CNN/A World Longing For LIGHT

*I write these blog posts from my heart..about my work with the First Nations People, about my teachers such as Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, about my time spent with terminally ill patients, about life off the grid in northern New Mexico. Though in some ways, I write for myself, I try always to share information and experiences that may be helpful to others, that are universal.

If you would like to contribute to to the continuation of these posts, there are 3 ways: the donate button on the side of this post, my gofund me page or poohsstore where we offer sacred and visionary art for these times of transition and transcendence

“Upon suffering beyond suffering; the Red Nation shall rise again and it shall be a blessing for a sick world. A world filled with broken promises, selfishness and separations. A world longing for light again. I see a time of seven generations when all the colors of mankind will gather under the sacred Tree of Life and the whole Earth will become one circle again..”  -Crazy Horse c 1870red shadow:turtle lodge

turtlelodgepic copyI’ve written a lot about Dave Courchene and the Turtle Lodge in previous posts. The Turtle Lodge is an international place of healing in Manitoba and it is a significant part of the New Earth that is now on the horizon.

totem_waterLast night when I couldn’t sleep I was thinking about the dichotomy or the split in the world today: so much ugliness, greed, materialism, so many lies, so little hope for peace… I was thinking in particular about the man who owns the company trying to put through the Dakota pipeline and who has put out such statements as kelcy-pig

Kelcy Warren has been very successful in a worldly way: he’s a billionaire and lives in a mega mansion in Dallas Texas.  But his motivation is self serving, GREED and so he is part of the old world which is dying.

And then I was thinking about the Water Protectors and their motivation: Protecting the Earth, the Water for all of us..for generations to come.little boy-camp-1

“Think not forever of yourselves, O chiefs, nor of your own generation. Think of continuing generations of our families, think of our grandchildren and of those yet unborn, whose faces are coming from beneath the ground.
Peacemaker, Founder of the Iroquois Confederacy
circa 1000 AD”,

And then I was thinking about the quiet places* where truth, enlightenment and peace can be found and these places are coming to the forefront now. The Turtle Lodge is one of these.

*Quiet not in the literal sense but in the sense that the elders and chiefs are generally soft spoken..they don’t yell or try to promote or call attention to themselves like almost all of the politicians in the US government and those in the corporate world.SAGE 2drummers

Lately I’ve been kind of looking back at my life and realizing that some of the work I’ve done, I did in an effort to be a ‘good person’ so I’ve done things that I really didn’t want to do. Not so much to be recognized…..I’ve never cared much about that but maybe because of my co-dependent personality, I’ve felt like I’ve had to make a huge effort to make people happy, to do good deeds.[A healer I went to several months ago pointed this out to me and though I didn’t like hearing it, it is true]

So I have some regrets and quite a few things that I’ve done in my work and for other people, I would not do again if I had the choice.

But the time I spent and the work I’ve done with The First Nations People shines as some of the best days of my life and some of the best of my work.turtle lodge-jacko

Over the years, I have heard many prophecies which suggest that the Native People are destined to be the teachers, our teachers for this time of the New Earth. These prophecies are not taught or are so readily available to the majority of people because the myth of White Power, White Superiority has been so heavily promoted as in Columbus discovered America [are you kidding?] and The First Thanksgiving [major  propaganda].

But the truth can be found and I think it can be seen and felt through some things happening now like ..the Water Protectors who are putting their lives on the line, to protect the Water, the Earth for all of us.


CAPTION: Following two days of arresting protestors trying to stop an oil pipeline on Treaty lands, officers joined in morning prayers. As officers learned more about the Tribe’s efforts to protect the Missouri River from oil leaks and contamination, many expressed personal support for clean water. (Photo: Mniluzahe Berg)

And as I’m writing this, I just saw that they have won and that the pipeline will be rerouted!!!!   “CNN) — The Army will not approve an easement that would allow the proposed Dakota Access Pipeline to cross under Lake Oahe in North Dakota, the Army’s assistant secretary for civil works announced Sunday.”

The Prophecy of the 8th Fire

They will come to a fork in the road. One road will lead to Materialism and Destruction…..for almost all living creatures….The other road will lead to a Spiritual Way upon which the Native People will be standing…This path will lead to the lighting of the 8th fire, a period of eternal peace, harmony and a “New Earth” where the destruction of the past will be healed

Anishnabe prophecy

So it seems  to me, as dark as things seem, some things are changing for the better, when against all odds, the Water Protectors are seeming to be successful and the Turtle Lodge is featured on CNN.

See the links below.

Turtle Lodge is featured on CNN     accompanying video clip

For more on Dave Courchene and the Turtle Lodge, our documentary, The 8th Fire One Earth One Whole Circle Again is available here

Trailer for The 8th Fire One Earth One Whole Circle Again