Night before last, kind of late, I got an email from a friend saying he was coming through this area on his way south and wondered if he could spend the following night. He isn’t someone I know very well– Stewart Warren is his name
I met him at the Ojo Caliente Spa several years ago when he was the IT Manager there and all I could remember about that time was how he read one his poems to me in the parking lot.
Stewart is however, a close friend of some friends of mine in Mountainair, New Mexico and he and I have kind of kept in touch by email. About a year ago when I was at a very low point and in deep despair, Stewart sent me an encouraging email which was so meaningful to me that I printed it out and for a year, kept it right next to my computer.
I didn’t want to hurt his feelings by telling him he couldn’t stay but I was SO tired, we had almost no food in the house and both me and my partner, Jody [the Brown Piglet in this blog] were going through our own emotional traumas.
So I didn’t answer the email but rather tried to come up with something to tell Stewart as to why he couldn’t spend the night. For hours I obsessed about this. To get my mind off of it, I watched a DVD from the spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle called Freedom From The World.
In the DVD, Eckhart was talking about the mind which constantly chatters and makes up stories..and he was talking about surrender. Like almost all the great spiritual teachers, Eckhart’s message is ‘Don’t think’.
Finally I thought, I cannot go on obsessing like this all night. I have to stop thinking about what to say and so I attempted to go to sleep and I did…. finally.
When I woke up exhausted in the morning, I told Jody about Stewart. Part of my reason for not wanting Stewart to stay was because I thought he and Jody would not like each other and it would be very uncomfortable.Jody is Hispanic, has a lot of tattoos, spent quite a bit of time in prison and jail when he was younger and spent very little time in school. Stewart on the other hand, is Anglo, a poet, well educated, would never have a tattoo [I thought] and would be unlikely to be in any way sympathetic [I thought] to someone who has lived the sort of life Jody has.
But surprisingly Jody told me “It’s fine, tell him to come” So I did, Stewart arrived and from the time he got out of his car, I realized I had been wrong about EVERYTHING. He brought with him a wonderful presence of grace, kindness, appreciation and acceptance. Most people who come here comment on the beauty of the place but Stewart noticed and appreciated everything: all the work we’ve done, what he called ‘the sacred spaces’, the shrines, the animals, Jody’s art and most of all he appreciated Jody. They were able to understand each other on some soul level where race, culture, education etc don’t matter. Jody was needing some encouragement and understanding and Stewart offered this.
And they had some life events in common that I would never have imagined. Plus I think Stewart actually has a tattoo.
Earlier in the summer, we had a somewhat similar experience. A friend from Arizona came to stay for a few days and she brought her husband Don who has Alzheimers. Don was often confused and struggled with words but it seemed that when there was something that really mattered, he understood perfectly. Before he left I gave him one of our Native American designed hoodies. On the back there is an explanation of what the Eagle means to the First Nations People and Don slowly read it to me “The Eagle brings a vision of LOVE that helps us see how we should walk in love and sacredness on Mother Earth. ALWAYS ACT IN LOVE.”
“That’s right” he said “That’s how it should be.”
When he and his wife left, there were tears in his eyes. “I don’t want to leave” he said. You all feel like family.”
At the soul level, everything is understood.
Stewart didn’t stay overnight–he had forgotten that he needed to get to Albuquerque for an appointment.. All my obsessing and losing sleep were for nothing.
This morning when I was drinking my coffee with the Brown Piglet, the Beatles song Let it Be’ came on the radio and I realized ‘Yeah, that’s right..just let it be. Let everything just BE… Everything and there will be an answer.’
“I wake up to the sound of music, Mother Mary comes to me
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, yeah, let it be
There will be an answer, let it be”
~Let it Be/The Beatles
Below is Let it Be Live from the Beatles and a poem Stewart Warren wrote about this area years ago. Stewart Warren’s author page on AMAZON.
*If you have found this blog helpful in some way, Please make a contribution. This blog is my particular way of contributing: by hopefully passing on the wisdom of the many teachers I spent time with and learned from: Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, addictions counselor, John Bradshaw, near death survivor Dannion Brinkley and Anishnabe Elder, Dave Courchene as well as many hospice patients and Elders that were part of my life.
A few years ago I experienced a huge betrayal which changed my work and my life. I learned that ‘your best friend can be your worst enemy’ and I lost a lot: my job, my salary and I could no longer do the work I had planned to do. Looking for a way to continue, I started this blog. Part of my story is here and this is also where you can make a contribution https://www.gofundme.com/poohsrainbow
As we are all in some way connected in this life, I sincerely thank you for your help-big or small..it doesn’t matter..
Cindy Pickard firstname.lastname@example.org